In some of the peptalks I've been having with myself I made a mental notes about how my kids on a regular basis pick up my blog books and read over them. (Even if they are just reading them to find my spelling or grammatical errors.) Maybe one day I'll have an editor in the family to help with that!
Some of the best advice I read was to set a timer for 9 minutes, go for a walk and take your camera, make a top ten list and talk about something you're looking forward to.
Some of the advice I wasn't so sure about was Tell a secret, talk about your body, do something that makes you feel uncomfortable and write about something that scares you.
Then it hit me. All of this writing is my nemesis because it forces vulnerability. Not all the time, especially since my blog is mostly family and kids memoirs. But writing in MY voice is vulnerable and it's something I struggle HARD with. I was once posed this question.
What does vulnerability mean to you?
I had one word.
Weakness.
To me, vulnerability was totally synonymous with weakness and weak wasn't a quality I was brought up to display.
I then went into a somewhat life changing nose dive into a world where vulnerability could possibly mean more. If I watched Berne Brown's Ted Talk once, I watched it a thousand times. I loved her and I hated her. I kinda still do.
She says
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
"We either own our stories (even the messy ones), or we stand outside of them—denying our vulnerabilities and imperfections, orphaning the parts of us that don’t fit in with who/what we think we’re supposed to be, and hustling for other people’s approval of our worthiness. Perfectionism is exhausting because hustling is exhausting. It’s a never-ending performance."
"Rather than sitting on the sidelines and hurling judgment and advice, we must dare to show up and let ourselves be seen. This is vulnerability. This is daring greatly"
"Vulnerability is the last thing I want you to see in me, but the first thing I look for in you."
"To claim the truths about who we are, where we come from, what we believe, and the very imperfect nature of our lives, we have to be willing to give ourselves a break and appreciate the beauty of our cracks or imperfections."
Her quotes on vulnerability never cease to convict me. It challenges me in the same way back blogging 6 months of life does. But it's just as important. Here's to being MORE vulnerability and ok with less than perfect because in essence, it's what we all want. Greater connection, belonging and vulnerability.
If you've never listened to this ted talk, DO IT! Its inspiring and eye opening and quite possibly life changing.
https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability
